Smart Woman Online

Pointing Out Potentially Embarrassing Boogies

July 27, 2009
By Suzanne Molino Singleton

Should we tell someone they have a boogie on their nose?

At the Orioles game on opening day, a guy entered our row of seats and sat on my left. After he unpacked binoculars and settled in, he introduced himself as Johnny. We chatted in general and it wasn’t long before I was forced to admit to him that he sported a glob of mustard on the right side of his mouth.

Listen Johnny, if we’re going to be seat-mates, there’s no way I’m putting up with that. The announcement simultaneously embarrassed him and made him feel appreciative — he thanked me with a blush.

It took several swipes with a napkin before Johnny cleared his yellow face, and we returned to the task of game watching and forging our temporary nine-inning friendship. (The poor schmuck also had a piece of bread stuck between two teeth but I didn’t have the courage to point out two food flaws, so I left that one alone.)

So the question is … do we tell a total stranger about an errant flaw so that he can alter it — thus embarrassing him once — or do we not say a word and let him walk around in public embarrassed repeatedly with a glob of mustard on his face?

I vote the former (obviously). I can think of a handful of incidents when I told perfect strangers something was askew:

• a guy in front of me in the airport security line had a price tag hanging out the back of his khaki shorts;
• a lady in the church pew in front of us at a wedding wore her sweater inside out;
• a lady walking into an office building as I was riding by had her skirt tucked inside the back of her pantyhose. (Is that the worst, or what?)
• I have pointed out to strangers and friends if they need to swipe their noses, or have another errant object hanging around their faces.

Listen, I’d want someone to tell me, wouldn’t you? Can you remember a time eating out with friends, and after you walked into the restroom, noticed a piece of lettuce was stuck between your teeth? Or you go into the restroom at the office and see a big smudge of black mascara under one eye. C’mon, even a friend or a coworker couldn’t have told you?

So I tell people to save them. I mean, even though it may be embarrassing for us to admit it aloud that they have a booger, and more humiliating for them to correct it, it’s only polite. We humans have to watch out for each other in the Polished Look Department while in public.

No wonder I carry a pocket mirror in my handbag and check it often … as I do the rearview mirror in my car, my reflection in a window, and the mirrors in stores.

This is not vanity! It’s a booger check. There’s a difference.

Baltimorean Suzanne Molino Singleton is a freelance columnist here and on www.examiner.com and www.yesnetwork.com (Mrs. Singy: Married to Baseball), and is the creator of the weekly inspirational e-column SNIPPETS (www.snippetsinspiration.com). When not writing, she plays house with sports celeb Ken Singleton and their dependents. suza...@snippetsinspiration.com

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